Saturday, March 05, 2005

Offensive or Not?

I have to talk about something I found tonight. I was going to write something about offensive language because someone I worked with suggested it might be nice. Instead, for now, I will choose to focus on a site that came up when I looked up "offensive language|" on Yahoo.

I just wanted to see what was considered offensive language. I couldn't believe what I saw. It was like seeing the very guide to Political Correctness in it's first chapter. I think it was kind of disgusting. Personally, I think it makes a bigger statement about our society and the hipocrisy of it. Think about this: would anyone who needs to learn these terms feel that way for real or are they just looking for a guide so that they don't lose their job or friends? Would they understand that naturally? Doesn't the idea of not offending people come with the enlightened personality that would try to learn about these things firsthand and there fore render useless such a guide? Doesn't non-offensive language in most cases mask the personality underneath and therefore hide the inner demon that would come out if one were to embrace the deception?
I think that the new politically correct environment bites ass. I would rather someone call me a faggot than pretend that they don't know or that they like it. Hell, maybe it's just me, but I would rather they be honest and let me know who my enemies are than hide in the shadows and play deceptive and Officially Sanctioned games. Hell, if the president went on the news tomorrow and told me that he thought that all the faggots were going to hell and he would do what he could to stop them I would probably respect him a little bit more. As it is he just panders and gesticulates all manner of levels of acceptance and basically disco dances with a public who is more than willing to accept it because his behavior and ideals are cast in the light of the status quo.
I use the President as an example, but there are far too many examples in the everyday world that present themselves. I don't know about anyone else but as I see it I would rather someone call me horrid names and therein give me the opportunity to give them the opportunity to enlighten them or shut them off like a goddamn light. We know that in the background of life these people are still bagging on any thing that presents itself in a sickly or disgusting light. If that's how they feel I would rather know it. There's no reason to hide it. If we can read in our history books about women being burned alive for being witches and black people being blown up, lynched, and god knows what else then why the hell can we listen to some bigoted waterhead go off about the lack of quality in women? Are we so goddamn sensitive as a people that we can't even hear them say that and know who we are that we are willing to live with strangers among us and be castrated by our own disbelief when we are confronted with the truth and the lies in behavior we ourselves forced on them? Are we really willing to believe that the chance of social exile will make them different people in the confines of their living room and in the unguarded public domain? If we are, we shouldn't be. It's retarded and delusional.
I often wonder if a lot of the political correctness that infects the world stems from our own guilt about not beating back those who use stereotypes to commit horrible acts. You know what I'm talking about. Lynchings, bashings, genocides. Come on. Don't tell me that for a good long time we all just turned the other way. Hell, we still do it now. Is it possible that maybe we should just condemn those people to horrible existences for the idea instead of forcing them to live among us and express contradictions to what they believe? Why can't we just take these bastards out in the street and beat the living shit out of them and leave them for dead? If they die so be it, if not maybe they will learn a thing or two and we won't look like such back-treading jelly fish for accepting that they are evil but we "contained them". I mean damn, what is it going to take before we just say screw it and send these bastards to hell. All making them talk like decent folk does is force them to pretend that they really like and/or accept everyone. Who knows what kind of dangerous pent up anger that sort of thing could lead? I don't even want to think about it. If I run into some skeazy son of a bitch at work who should have his nuts crushed into pudding because he is just screwed beyond belief I should have to pretend that I like him. If I don't want to say nice things to him no one should make me because that just gives him a false sense of accomplishment and it makes me want to tear his head off and then sterilize just to make sure that he doesn't infect me. Is this making sense? I know that there are probably very few people who don't understand. I'm not saying I should be able to openy insult him at random, but dammit don't make me pretend I respect him and use terms like please and thank you when he doesn't even deserve the kind of respect that "fuck you" implies. I shouldn't have to give him that sense of self-comfort if he really doesn't deserve it. That's just wrong for him and I to have to put up with. I should be allowed to be short and to the point without reprieve and room for consideration. It is work and I will never be there to make friends. The point of a job is to make a paycheck and I will never believe that making some psychotic, pathologically lying hosebag feel better about his status in life is part of making that paycheck. Dammit, there needs to be limits. If I am a royal loser at my job I want to know that. I don't need the personal reassurance of an equal number of good things to bad to get through life. I am either good at my job or bad. There should be those extremes. Why does it have to be so bland? If the standards for judgement are bland than would the higher positions those standards imply be just as bland? Give me a good reason to want to try. Don't make me think that life is just as dull up above as it now with universal standards of comfort. That just sucks. Give me something to look forward to. Is that so much to ask? No pain, no gain, right?
Tonight, I am sitting here with a glass of rum and Coke at my hand. I have considered the possibility that I am what is considered a drunk by today's standards. Well, I guess I used to. At this point in my life I have considered it for the last time, I think. I don't get the point of worrying about such things for a good many people. If you wake up most of the time and you don't know what happened the night before and you don't know where you're at or how you got there than maybe you should consider other things if that bothers you. As for me, I get drunk and sometimes I get out of control a little bit. Nothing dangerous, just a little outrageous in what I say. The thing is I don't believe in a lot of the new standards. The "new dumb" have created an environment that makes personal hedonism a human defect. If a man runs out tomorrow and gets drunk and fucks up someone who was trying to get from point A to point B then that would not be personal hedonism anymore now would it? That would be recklessness. On the other hand, if I should choose to spend 50 or 60 years ruining my body and my lifespan with alcohol and cigarettes that should be my choice. Should society have any right to make me try to feel guilty for indulging in things that might kill me? I don't think so. First and foremost it is my body. Give me the info if you must and then go away. If I choose to do something with it than that is my choice, right? Ah, but I learned a trick. I found my own personality at some point and made my own decisions about what I like. I have come to the conclusion that what society expects of me will never materialize. I'm okay with that. That is not a decision stemming from failure or pain or rejection. I just don't like the options organized society has given me. Most of them suck, although I do hold some respect for the Ten Commandements. I like those. I think they could make us all better people even if we aren't crippled, god-fearing Christians., but that's a wholly different tangent. I think. Anyway, back to the point. I just don't think that I should have to worry about the standards set for me. Universal standards are made for those that don't have the strength to find their own confidence which, I believe, builds their soul into a being they should live in. I really believe that most of us just wander in a world dictated to us rather than by us. I'm not saying that tomorrow we should all break off the shackles of society and live a shack in the woods and blow people up by mail. In fact, the point I make is just the opposite. If you enjoy going to work everyday at a gas station or a factory and coming home knowing that you are paying the bills and little else, then dammit don't worry about society saying you should always achieve the most and the biggest. If you don't want to go to college and become some certified idiot you don't really want to be then don't do it. It's that simple dammit. By that same notion, not everyone can be everything or, in some cases, even something. Some of us are doomed to be "nothings" and we need to accept that. If you want elaboration I think you just need to listen to "It's Alright Ma ( I'm Only Bleeding)" by Bob Dylan. I think that will tell you all you need to hear about that if you listen with the right ears. Hell just read the lyrics. WWW.BOBDYLAN.COM Try it out. You might understand it a little better if you read it from him than me, because I think he summarized it better and I am not afraid to admit it. Maybe you should just read the words and then decide if you want to hear it. For some reason, there are entirely too many people who refuse to listen to Bob Dylan just because he is old and classic. What the fuck is that?
Anyway. I suppose I should cut this off because I would imagine that most people have tuned out by now. I think I made a good chunk of my point and knowing me I will come back to it later if I have more to say. So chew on that for bit and if you come to a point where you think I should hear what you have to say feel free to write me. I would love to hear what you have to say. If it suits you, feel free to leave me an email address so we can talk more about it or just talk more period.

Shan Froman

PS-How's that for editing out the horrifying content that could screw me? Do you think I made my point without breaking the harshness factor? SF

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

I Bet This Will Wreck What Little Credibility I Will Ever Have....Shit!

December 10, 1999

Emptiness fills up the rest of my bed
Music fills up my lonely head
I won’t open the curtains
Bright light
Pounding head
Too much of this scene would leave me dead
Sleep eludes me
So does a civil tone
Music throbs in the distance
Humming the pounding in my headblood
The heat of this blanket
Flips me over
Spreads me around
Going in through the out
Head colored green and throbbing red and black
Animals lingering in the distance
Soon floating in the air
Inspiration in our lungs
Seedy rhythms in out loins
All this time the clock kicks forward
Abusing me like the ugliest prisoner in the Vagabond Hotel
Soon I’ll be on and I’ll throw them off
Screaming meanings
Useless meanings
Valued in that useless, deprived time
Baggy shirt and dirty pants
Useless attempting and militant chants
Been here before
Use the pills like a whore
Caffeine dreams
Ephedrine steam
Load me up, I’m lost again
Sick to my stomach
Sick of my head
To much of this will make me dead
I cannot help it
I have... responsibility
My body won’t comply
My brain is running dry
Funky brain drunk melody
Combines the smoke and the uselessness of this calamity
Catchy rhyme (tunes alive)
Burning time ( time to hide)
Feeling sick
It’s time to go
I’ll just stick it in the radio

Monday, February 28, 2005

Gold Stars and Queer Notions. Is there really a point? Probably not.

What The Fuck?!?
The Oscars As A Major Headline At 4:30 in the Morning.
MSNBC:Iraq Blast Kills Dozens 4:34 AM
NYT: Real Headlines in Bold
USA Today:Iraq Car Bombs
Washington Post:Next To No Distinction From Other Headlines
NBC News: Oscars Hidden Headline!!!

Well, what the fuck is going on with the news world. A friend of mine told me that modern news is BS and I agreed. Shit just look at the above. The goddamned Oscars were the biggest headline of the night. I know that the people of the world want to know, but Jesus. Why? Will it fucking matter in a year if "Million Dollar Baby" was even made? I don't know. I haven't seen it. All I do know is that there so much going on the world and we choose to watch famous people get statues and we love it. If it's not famous people it's people who could be famous if Paula Abdul likes them. Just out of curiosity do you think that anytime soon there will be a show about smart people?
On tonight's American Brain...can they prove they know more than someone else....? Shit. The probably lost point being that maybe it would be nice for a change for celebrity to shift into something useful like intelligence and real thought. Fuck, if these people can make William Hung a celebrity why not make someone who has studied all their life to grasp something and know things a celebrity. We could then maybe inspire the kids to want to know more instead of leaving the house everyday dressed like Britney Fucking Spears.
Sorry, I got off the point there, but that had to be said. I think the biggest thing we need to worry about is making that the new breed of parents puts a goddamn end to it. Don't let you children be whores even if they might feel alienated. There is no reason for it. Are you that desperate for the approval of people who will probably hate you tomorrow anyway. I am still talking to the parents. You children are young. Teenagers will hate you on a moments notice regardless. That is how teenagers are. It will happen. So, why not give them a legitimate reason to hate you and tell them that they shouldn't leave the house looking like (plug in random whore both male and female) and then tell them why. You know how kids think. Explain to them why sexy probably isn't the best thing when they are 13. You can do it and if you ask me (and you probably wouldn't ever) you should. It's your obligation. You are the parent. Remember that you created that child and that whatever they go through in life you are at least partly responsible. You created them. They had no choice. You need to guide them. Show them the way and quit fucking around.
Keep in mind that this doesn't come from television or magazines. I am talking about the KIDS that I see every day in the world and so on. Girls with short shirts and pants that outline their vaginas better than most diagrams and boys that just want to get into those pants and really can now that the girls are willing. Sex is bad for kids. Don't enable them to sell it to each other just because they will bitch and moan about looking stupid in front of the other kids. GROW SOME BALLS PARENTS!!! They will thank you for it later. Just don't cave in. Make them be better people.
That is your job.
Who the fuck knows? Maybe I am just a bitter person. I am the type of person that will sooner burn a Valentine than give a shit. Valentines are another useless piece in the facade that is humanity's play. I have never understood them. Even as a child I wondered what the point was. Yes, I was the kid who didn't any that weren't required, but I think that in retrospect that taught me a few things. I have learned not to take genuine affection for granted. The cards I got were stupid to me. They were required. I have no romantic idea about any of them coming to me under the guise of requirement hiding unrequited love. I never tried to tell myself that love. I never questioned the lack of love behind them. Now my opinion has become something different. Now I try to let the people that I love know it all the time instead of getting so wrapped up in my life that I need a designated holiday to tell me that at least once a year I have to remember. To me, that's cheap. That's like fucking the girl that is still drinking when most everyone has either has either passed out or gone home. Sure it's kind of good to just get off, but we all know that you are praying that either she or he is too drunk to remember in the morning or that they at least have the decency not to talk to you when everyone is awake. Yeah, boys and girls it really is that fucked up. Most of us have done it, but very few of us are willing to talk about it at the time and most of the time the only time it will ever come up is in the middle aged "That party was so fucked up" stories. Get over it goddammit. You are still the same pervert you always were and wrinkles will never change that. Get over it.
Maybe the whole world needs to realize that. Just fucking get over it.
Think about this. The only that will really make a difference in the world is the sun expanding and destroying it in a few billion years. Everything else is just details.

Random Questions You Might Want To Think About:
How much do you really think your birthday is worth to anyone else but you?
How much are your friends worth if you always rely on them being there even when you fuck
Is there really a point to (plug in something) history month? Aren't there just a few people
out there who really want to learn anything, much less a singular history?
Isn't symbolism stupid?
Is there any point to tradition and if so, what?

Well, I think that I have laid enough shit on the table for now. I'm not sure I can even answer all the questions I just asked. I guess that means it's time to. I don't know where this started, but I guess I know where it should end. I'm going to finish this drink and have another cigarette and then hopefully I will be compelled to go to bed. Have fun and think about all this. Please?

Shan Froman

"No one wants to hear you preach."

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